in 2005, I quit my job because my boss was dishonest. I could not work under such conditions

in 2006, I killed a cat with my car. I was deeply saddened but I was glad it wasn't a human, because cats are not as important as humans

in 2007, I played ultimate frisbee for hours every single day. I was in the best shape of my life. To get back to that health level, I would have to train extensively. Though it is not one of my immediate goals, I do intend to best myself before age limits my abilities

in 2008, I lost my shirt playing the stock market. I learned a valuable lesson: sometimes even spreading your seeds cannot prevent famine.

in 2009, I ran around my college campus naked at night. I was detained by the police, but since our school is a liberal arts school, after some discussion about this being an example of free expression, I was let off with 30 hours of community service

in 2010, I will be entering into ******** as a first year med student. I will be meek and poor, but I will eat sh*t and get hazed daily if it means that I amount to something the university is willing to hand a diploma to

in 2011, i will be convicted of 11 counts of perjury. I will not have any excuse for the matter, and plead insanity. It will not work because I am too smart to be insane.